These Three Remain...

My grandmother wrote this hilarious account of her experience while trying to get a new cell phone ordered a few months ago that I just had to share with you all! Enjoy! :D

All I wanted to do is pick out a new cell phone.
If I renew my Verizon contract for two years, which I had planned to do anyway, I can have practically any telephone I want for free if I buy online. So I am perusing the Verizon web site while talking on my elderly Motorola cell phone to a customer service representative. She says she can't renew my contract with my present telephone because it lacks GPS capability, which is required for 911 operators to know where I am. I am flabbergasted! "What!?" I say to her. "Do you mean these new cell phones know where I am all the time? How can that be possible? Half the time I don't even know where I am, and you're telling me all I have to do is ask my telephone and it will help me find my way home?"
"Absolutely," she assured me. So these new phones are smarter than I am! I'll never get lost again!
("Mom, I think we must have taken a wrong turn."
"Melody, just ask the cell phone how we managed to go two hours out of our way, and how to get back.")
But that wasn't the end of the surprises. I noted that most of the phones are equipped with a Blue Tooth. Now I don't want to sound old-fashioned, but I always thought white teeth looked pretty good on most people. And I told the CS Rep as much. She explained what the Blue Tooth is for, but she couldn't tell me where it got its name. How something that hangs on your ear got named a Tooth I'll never figure out.
Further down the list of the latest features, I ran across a couple of phones which boasted "removable memories." Really, at my age I struggle with half my memory feeling like it has been removed on any given day, so why would I want a telephone with the same problem? Again, the CS Rep (trying to keep a straight face, from the sound of her voice) told me that "removable memory" really refers to "additional memory", stored on a tiny little card that fits into the tiny little cell phone. And when she told me how much memory can be packed onto that tiny little card, I knew -- I just KNEW -- that the Star Trek age is just around the corner. One day soon, I will be able to just slap the Communicator button embedded in my chest, and my blue tooth will activate my GPS and it will all be recorded on my removable memory card. I wonder if I will be able to remember where I put the card?

--Patricia D.

The last two weeks have been an absolute whirlwind for us. Thank you all so much for your prayers; we survived! :P God has been so good to us.
I'm not sure exactly where to start, but I guess the beginning would be a good place. Let's see--the real "whirlwind" started Monday morning, May 7 (Kara's birthday :D). I had AP testing at one of the local highschools on Monday, Thursday (my b-day, and I had a graduation rehearsal that same day), and Friday (two tests in a row that day!). Whew! Needless to say, by Friday evening I was exhausted--well, "brain dead" was the phrase I used several times, I believe. Then a mad dash to get everything needed Saturday morning and we were off for my graduation, being held at a huge church close by. That, ladies and gentlemen (wait, are there any gentlemen who read my blog? ;) ), was absolutely incredible. Our homeschooling group put this graduation together, and, well....how to describe it! It was beautiful--we were all amazed. There were twenty-seven homeschoolers that graduated (from our local homeschooling group)! Sometime in the near future I hope to get a video of it put together for you all. We had one of the the Justices of the Texas Supreme Court give the commencement address; that too was phenomenal! I could go on and on about it, but I'll save that for another time when I have pictures and/or video. ;) Anyway, the week after my graduation, I had four more AP exams, the last of which was that Thursday. I am finished with AP exams!!!! Finished! Praise the Lord! :) I am completely finished with highschool (well, except for a few lessons of Spanish II). So this past week has been a sort of "wind down" time for us; pretty relaxed compared to the past few months.
So, thank you all for keeping us in your prayers; the whirlwind is past (I think! :P), but please continue to pray for us. If you all have any prayer requests, please let me know so that I and my family can keep you in our prayers!
Lord willing, my posts will become more regular now, so be sure to continue checking in when you get the chance!
God bless you all!
~Kristen